Ameer Hakeem al Waseem- Siri 3

I was really worried when the milk wasn't naturally produced shortly after I gave birth. I mean, I keep telling people that sucking comes first, only then milk production follows, but truthfully I was worried. When I was taking care of Hakeem in NICU, I sat with other mothers in the nursing room. We chatted. There was one first-time mother who told us that her milk only came on Day 3, but she continued to breastfeed her baby since birth. This 1st timer actually convinced me that all would be well! Oh well any mothers need assurance hehe.

Morning of the 3rd day, the makcik urut came. Mandi herba, minum air rebus akar kayu, tungku and he taught abang how to use the bengkung jawa sebab abang yang akan pakaikan bengkung ni sepanjang pantang. 8 metre long! After that I went to NICU again to nurse Hakeem.

Hakeem was discharged in the evening of the 3rd day. We went home that night and plan to go back to KL early morning the next day. I started feeling feverish with chills and rigor. That night was one of the worst night, I had severe breast engorgement such that abang and me stayed up that night, panaskan tungku, tuam breast, tried to pump tapi tak berjaya. Keras macam batu and I guess that was my first test. Rasa nak stop breastfeeding! All 4 of us cramped ourselves sleeping on the king bed and I was shaking throughout the night, sampai abang selimutkan dengan toto. On top of that I still had severe generalized body ache and I couldnt move on my own. Susah sangat2 nak breastfeed Hakeem, setiap kali dia nangis, mommy pun nangis. Stress sangat3.

I didnt want to surrender myself to the hospital yet. Nak balik KL dulu. Tak sampai hati tengok abang dah 3-4 hari tak cukup tidur handle everything alone. Kalau kena admit kat KL (waktu tu memang sangat yakin akan kena admit), at least ummi boleh jaga Faheem. Sampai KL, tercapai hajat atuk ninek nak tengok cucu. Tapi Hakeem started to have fever also. So the next morning, we went to Hospital Sungai Buloh and surrendered ourselves. Hakeem was admitted for another 2 days and discharged after blood test came back normal. I sent him home to be taken care by ninek and daddy. Aku pula demam temperature spiking gila2 sampai 40 degree celcius for 4 days, memang tak daya nak jaga Hakeem. Sekejap berpeluh peluh, sekejap menggigil2. Was treated for endometritis with Zinacef and Flagyl. After 4 days, investigation came back and I had Group A B-lactamase Pseudomonas Aeruginosa UTI!!! Completed 5 days of IV Zinacef and was planned for escalation of antibiotic by Infectious Disease team---> to cefepime! Menangis tak berlagu mak. Kena stay kat wad for another 10 days huuu. Waktu tu abang dah kena balik Kelantan and start kerja. Aku dah menangis emo tak nak kena tinggal. Tak tahulah apesal clingy sangat kat abang sobsss. Tak boleh terima hakikat berpisah dengan abang even for 1 day. Sebab tu bila abang or me has to attend course kat tempat jauh, mesti kena plan ambil cuti so that we can go together as a family. Huuu zaman berjauhan dengan abang has long gone.. and I dont want to go through that again.

So pendek cerita, abang arranged for me to be transferred to Hosp Kuala Krai. So kami semua baliklah Kelantan semula with Ummi. Berakhirlah episod aku berpantang kat Selangor haha. Tungku kemana, bengkung jawa kemana, berurut pun tak pernah! So kat K.Krai aku pun admitted semula utk completekan 10 days of IV Cefepime. Tapi dapat bertahan selama 5 hari je. Lepas 5 hari, memang dah tak tahan sangat duduk hospital. Minta abang ambil AOR (At Own Risk discharged). Abang discuss dengan MO O&G, and he allowed me to go home (without AOR discharge) but I have to come to the hosp for IV Antibioitc. So for the next 3 days, I went to the hospital 2x/ day for meds. And for the remaining 2 days, he allowed us to bring home the meds and abang served the IV anbtibiotic at home. Hadoiiii macam2 cerita bersalin kali ni. 

Ummi went back to Subang yesterday, so it's the 4 of us alone again.. to start a new life as a family of 4. Sebelum ni bila stress Hakeem buat perangai, senang2 boleh pass kat Ninek. Sekarang betabahlah kalau Hakeem mengamuk sepanjang malam pun huuu. At 3 weeks, I feel healthy Alhamdulillah. Memang betul2 strict ambil Postnatal Set shaklee because I know I dont have any choice but to be a supermom huuu. Cuma I wish for more me-time huuu. I kind of miss abang eventhough we are living together. Having 2 kids really occupy us. Abang kena 'gang' dgn Faheem while I entertain Hakeem. And I end up missing abang so much T_T x sabar tunggu Hakeem besar hahaha. 

So I guess that is it, do wait for my next entry--> Breastfeeding for Dummy (me) 

Ameer Hakeem Al Waseem- Siri 2

so this is the continuation from the 1st series hahaha

Bila abang attended Hakeem, nurse pun jahit luka. I felt so sleepy and extremely tired as if I have just finished a 20km running marathon. My energy level was 0 such that I felt like could not even raise my own hand. Another nurse then came, bringing a glass of hot milo and biscuits. I quickly finished the drink and ate few biscuits but I also felt so nauseous and very dizzy at the same time. Rasa tak sedap satu badan and serba tak kena. When abang came back, abang tolong urut belakang. Lepastu terus muntah segala isi perut and I felt better but was still very tired. By then Hakeem dah ok, but was still breathing fast. Abang nak pass Hakeem untuk initiate breastfeeding tapi memang tak mampu nak pegang, so lepas try sekejap (tapi Hakeem tak menyusu pun), abang sent him back to the observation area. Sempat tahnik dengan kurma. I fell asleep sampai 5.30pm!!! Bila bangun, a Paediatric doctor came to me and told me that he would be admitted because he was tachypnoeic (bernafas terlalu laju) and oxygenation was not that good. I said ok. Abang balik dulu to fetch Faheem and later a nurse sent me to the postnatal ward.

I felt fresher and took a shower. Rasa lebih segar. Dinner pun sampai and I finished my meal. Not long after that abang arrived with Faheem and together we went to NICU. Hakeem was kept NBM (kena puasa) because of his rapid breathing. He was started on antibiotic. My body was still not producing breastmilk so I had no issue with pumping. For the first time in many months, I had an extremely good night sleep ;p

I was discharged the next morning but Hakeem had to stay in NICU for at least 2 days. So I went back home and know what I did? Aku masak sup tulang huhuu. Sebenarnya sebelum admit haritu, dah rebus tulang for 2 hours. Semangat nak masak sup tulang. Tapi x sempat. So minta abang simpan dulu tulang rebus tu dalam fridge. Lepas keluar je hospital, I just had to finish cooking it. Melanggar pantang larang sungguh! Tidur sekejap tengah hari tu and plan untuk ke NICU malam nanti sebab Hakeem dah boleh start feeding.

We have 2 big cupboards (almost floor-to-ceiling) in our room, with doors entirely lined with mirrrors. Guess what? I hate that the most because I hate looking at my own figure! Baby dah keluar but I still looked like I was 4-5 months pregnant. Oh the flabby abdomen, the unshapely figure, urgghhhh. I was in denial, but let it be. I tried convincing myself that this is normal for a mother who had just gave birth a day ago, but I still hate it haha.

Day 2- still no breastmilk!!!! I became panic, but luckily I had my bestfriend Dr Hana- a lactation consultant to calm me down hehe. Memang consultant lah kan klu dulu dia boleh pam susu sekali sampai 20oz! Cuba pam, cuba buat massage semua tak jalan. Ok, this is so weird and so unlike my experience with Faheem. Time Faheem dulu, lepas bersalin and masuk postnatal ward, aku mengantuk nak tidur. Tapi nurse datang suruh susukan baby. Waktu tu dia buatkan marmet, mencurah2 susu keluar!

Try lah makan alfalfa and minum ESP, masih tak keluar susu. Jadi petang tu, panggil makcik tukang urut untuk buat urutan tambah susu. Memang depserate dah ni sebab malam tu nak g susukan Hakeem. Makcik tu urut and tungku, ada keluar susu sikit, tak banyak. But that is better than nothing :) Aku tanya mak cik tu, pernah tak dia jumpa orang yang bersalin tapi tak ada susu badan? Dah usaha macam2 tapi still tak ada susu badan? Makcik tu kata TAK PERNAH. Dia kata ada yang sampai 3-4 hari takde susu. Tapi mesti ada lepas tu bila baby suck, urut, dsb. Aku rasa lega sangat bila dia kata camtu. Sebenarnya selalu jumpa mak yang bawa anak jaundice, tak bagi susu badan sebab tak ada susu. Tapi susu tu ada, cuma cepat dan lambat je. Tapi kalau tengok tak ada susu, lepastu terus tak bagi anak menyusu badan, memang susu tak akan keluar sebab takde stimulation from baby.

So that night I went to NICU and stayed there for few hours till 1-2am menyusukan Hakeem. It was such a wonderful indescribable feeling. Hakeem pandai menyusu, and tak menangis lapar pun walaupun susu masih tak banyak. I love the bonding time, he warmed up to me instantly and I guess that is the most beautiful thing for a mother. I looked at his contented face and told Hakeem he should be thankful to Allah because in the world where pembuangan bayi becomes a norm, he was choosen by Allah to be born in a family who loves him. We prepared extensively for his arrival and couldnt wait for him to be born. I gain more confidence Alhamdulillah and went back home feeling happier and satisfied :)

Ameer Hakeem Al Waseem- Siri 1

Alhamdulillah setelah 2 minggu yang mencabar, hari ni Allah berikan nikmat ketenangan hati :)
Rasa teruja nak kongsi pengalaman melahirkan Ameer Hakeem ke dunia. I love reading birth stories written in blogs, and I love watching birth stories shown on TV (Channel 733 Astro). During the final days of my pregnancy, I read so many blogs featuring experiences in giving birth, and tried to imagine how my story would be unfold :) So here goes mine...

My story started on 3rd of September 2015. It was Thursday and I was still working 8am-10pm. Faheem was not feeling well that day so I brought him to the clinic with me. When I got home, at around 10.30pm, Faheem went to bed and I went to the kitchen to prepare my meal. I love this time of the day as usually it's  the time for me to unwind on the couch, cuddling with abang while enjoying my meal and watching my favourite programme on TV. But not that night. 

When I was doing some dishes at the kitchen sink, I felt a gush of water down my legs which created a pool on the kitchen floor. I was surprised but kind of expected this anytime as I had passed my delivery due date for 2 days. Called abang to the kitchen asking for his opinion. 

"Abang rasa ni liquor (air ketuban) ke?"
"Ye kot"

Cuba bau, tak ada bau
Tak ada warna.

Ambil kain buruk untuk lap lantai. Abang sempat tanya lagi, air ketuban najis ke x? Hahaha abang ni memang OCD sket bab najis2 ni. 

I went to the toilet and changed into a new set of pajamas. Returned to the sink to continue doing the dishes. Suddenly a seocnd gush, this time around, habis basah lencun seluar. Jerit panggil abang lagi haha. Abang tanya nak g hospital ke? I said no sebab tak sakit lagi, baby was still active plus it was late at night and I dont want to wake Faheem up. So I decided to wait until the next morning. 

The next morning (4th September 2015) still there wre no contractions. Siap2 kemas rumah, lepastu bersiap untuk ke hospital. Sebelum ke hospital, sempat singgah Warung Sulaiman pekena roti canai dulu hehe.

Sampai hospital (Hospital Kuala Krai), biasalah check semua benda. Baby sihat Alhamdulillah (CTG was normal), I was 1cm dilated (and has been 1cm dilated for the past 2 weeks. Tahu sebab abang check kat rumah), no contractions. Bila scan, air ketuban dah kurang. My last scan was 3 days before that, AFI (air ketuban) was 14. Bila check kali ni, tinggal 7. So I was admitted in Merpati 1 and antibiotic was commenced, while planned for labour induction the next morning. 

Malam tu, ada irregular contraction which was very mild and did not bother me at all. But I couldnt sleep the whole night because of my generalized bodyache huu. Kalau tidur katil sendiri boleh tahan lagi, tapi bila kena tidur kat katil hospital, rasa macam semua tulang dipatah patahkan. So I sat on a chair the whole night, while texting abang sakit badan, tak boleh tidur, panas etc. Nurse tanya, sakit ke? I said sakit belakang, bukan sakit nak bersalin. Hahahaha sorry lah banyak sangat complain ;p

The next morning (5th September 2015), I was still 1cm dilated. Still no contractions. So Prostin (ubat paksa bersalin) was inserted at 7.20am. Right after Prostin insertion, contractions started coming in. It was strong with a frequency of 4 in 10 (4 contractions in 10 minutes, about 2 minutes apart) Dah mula tak senang duduk. Tak boleh baring sebab bila baring semakin sakit. Texted abang, cakap dah start sakit. Abang suruh baca Quran. So I sat in a chair, reading SurahMaryam. Bila baca translation Surah Maryam, kuatkan hati. At least aku dikelilingi ramai orang dikala sakit, unlike Maryam Ummu Isa, bersalin seorang diri, Allah runtunnya hati. Abang datang at 10am, hantar makanan. Penuh meja. Ada roti canai, milo ais, nasi dengan macam2 lauk. Abang kata nak g hantar makanan kat Faheem (yang duduk rumah pengasuh), lepastu baru datang hospital semula. 

Abang came back at around 12pm. Makanan hospital pun sampai. Nampak sedap and I actually finished the food! Hahaha. Lepas makan ajak abang keluar jalan jalan. Kononnya nak bagi kepala baby cepat turun. Kat Malaysia tak galakkan sangat patient berjalan2 bila sakit ni, tapi kat UK memang diorang galakkan patient berjalan. Waktu nak keluar pintu wad, nurse tanya nak ubat tahan sakit tak. Boleh senyum gelak gelak lagi, cakap taknak. Sakit sikit je. Aku pun pegang tangan abang and actually walked out of the ward sampai dekat cafeteria hospital! Waktu tengah berjalan tu, terserempak dengan Dr Adam, MO O&G oncall. Dia advise suruh berjalan angkat kaki tinggi supaya cepat jalan buka. Jangan heret2 kaki. Aku pun berjalanlah macam orang tengah berkawad haha. Bila contraction kuat sgt, I had to stop until the contraction was over, then sambung berjalan lagi.

Balik ward at around 1.15pm as I was due for the next examination (cek jalan 6 jam selepas masuk Prostin). 3cm. Alhamdulillah ada progress :) The doctor assured me that I will deliver that day and scheduled for the next examination after 4 hours at 5pm, and probably I could go to labour room after that. I was all smile :) Alhamdulillah Allah permudahkan kali ni sebagaimana Allah permudahkan time Faheem dulu. So balik ke katil, I decided to shower. Panas Ya Allah. Hospital lama, aircond rosak, atap zink. Rasa macam dalam sauna. Sehari berkali2 aku mandi. Abang kata nak g masjid untuk solat zohor, tapi aku tak bagi haha. Tak berani lepaskan abang g jauh2. Asked abang to wait at the bed till I finish taking my bath. It was around 1.30pm at that time. Lepas mandi, sampai je kat katil tiba2 rasa contraction yang maha kuat yang memang tak boleh tahan. Laju je mengalir air mata. Bila contraction stop, serta merta sakit tu hilang. Cepat2 bersiap untuk Zohor dan minta abang solat di surau luar wad. Contraction sangat kerap dan lama, tengah solat tu, air mata tak berhenti henti mengalir. Sakitnya Allah je yang tahu. Siap2 jama' sekali dengan Asar, bimbang lama di labour room dan susah nak solat Asar nanti. Lepas solat around 1.45pm, terus call abang tanya kat mana. Abang kata dia dah siap solat and on the way ke wad. At that time, tak berani dah nak duduk, terus baring atas katil. Rasa kejang tak boleh nak gerak. Minta kakak katil sebelah tolong panggil nurse. Bila nurse datang, kata kat nurse nak ubat tahan sakit. Minta sambil nangis teresak esak tu haha, drama habissss. Tak lama lepas tu dlm 2pm, seorang houseman (doktor pelatih) Dr Nadia datang. Dr Nadia ni memang banyak berjasa. Dari mula admit ward, masukkan prostin, cek pula 6 jam selepas tu hehe. Dia kata, Dr Adam pesan suruh pecahkan air ketuban (ARM) and pesan suruh jalan2. I told her memang dah terlalu sakit, I could barely move, let alone walk. So dia consult balik Dr Adam and lepastu minta masuk labour room untuk ARM. Wad ni bersambung dengan labour room. Bila sakit berkurang, aku pun berjalan kaki ke labour room (2-3 minit je), sambil dipapah oleh abang. Kat labour room, rasa tak sabar nak baring sebab sakit sgt. Kelam kabut tukar baju and tanggalkan apa2 yang patut. Waktu dah baring dalam labour room, it was around 2.20pm. Nurse pasang CTG, tapi bacaan jantung baby dah tak cantik, and contraction gila2 dalam 6-7 contractions dalam 10 minit. Practically hampir continuous lah. Dr Nadia pecahkan air ketuban, cek bukaan 4cm. Abang gosok2 perut, genggam tangan and baca quran non stop, aku rasa benda tu sangat membantu untuk tenangkan hati. Latihan breathing technique semua tak berkesan dah rasanya haha. Bernafas lah ikut lagu mana pun, dok try imagine macam2, tapi sakit tu tak berkurang.

Waktu tu memang terdetik dalam hati, impossible nya orang perempuan kena tanggung sakit macam ni, rasa defnitely this will be the last, rasa macam tak boleh bayang duduk dalam labour room lagi 6 jam, rasa macam boleh ke nak teran ni? Macam2 haih. Waktu tu tak henti henti baca lailahailla anta subhanaka inni kuntu minadzalimin. Memang tak boleh nak baring betul dah, rasa nak mengiring sangat3. tapi nurse minta tahan sekejap untuk completekan CTG. lepas habsi CTG baru boleh bagi ubat tahan sakit. Aku minta gas untuk kurangkan sakit (Entonox), jadi bila sedut tu rasa lalok pening2 je. Tak sempat habis CTG 20 minit, tiba tiba datang urge rasa nak push. Nurse cek bukaan dah 10cm, dah boleh push. Subhanallah, baru 20 minit dalam labour room, waktu tu 2.40pm. 

Abang nak sambut sendiri tapi aku tak bagi. Sebabnya aku sangat2 perlukan abang untuk genggam tangan, untuk bagi semangat. So bidan yang sambut. Selepas 10 minit, Ameer Hakeem pun lahir ke dunia Alhamdulillah :) Tapi Hakeem tak menangis waktu lahir. Biru. Aku tengok je dia senyap dan biru, dan terus dibawa ke tempat resuscitation. No skin to skin, no breastfeeding but lucky them i knew better than to argue about some gentle birth elements. Abang ikut Hakeem, and I prayed that everything would be well... (to be continued)

Working on my EDD (Estimated Delivery Date)

3 September 2015

Well this is just beyond expectation! I have never imagined that my body would be able to hold on this long. The baby is more than 3kg, the very thing that I have prayed for since the first moment I knew I was pregnant. Alhamdulillah he is very active. And guess what?? We already have a name for him! Hehehe. 

I don't write much during this pregnancy, as compared to the time I was pregnant with Faheem. I was a student, and students basically have nothing else to do haha. Well you can tell that I am quite busy but not busy in the same time. Oh how could that be?

Well, my maternity leave started 2 weeks ago, preceded by unpaid leave for 2 weeks. But being me, I took this opportunity to take on a new job- being in charge of a private clinic with the plan to enjoy 2 weeks of maternity leave at most :) I hope mommy and baby will be healthy. I had only 2 weeks of maternity leave when I gave birth to Faheem, and I guess that is not uncommon among doctors. I dont work in a construction site doing demanding labour work. I work in a clinic where I sit most of the time..and talk ngee~ so it should be fine insyaAllah.

I have too many things on my plate right now but will try my very best to blog about them all! One of my biggest motivation for me to work as a private General Practitioner is because I need the experience to open my very own General Practice (clinic). I am trying my best to transform my e-klinik (Klinik Dr Maryam Aziz) into a real one, in 2016 insyaAllah. Do pray hard for me :) Will write about this later :)

siapa nak jumpa Dr Maryam yang lemah lembut, baik hati dan comel ni bolehlah datang klinik nanti ye ahahahah

To sum up, this pregnancy is totally different from the first one! The hyperemesis part during the earlier chapter was more or less the same, or probably milder (having said that i still had to take 1 month of unpaid leave haha). But the pain? Oh my, don't compare between carrying a 2+ kg baby and an almost 4kg baby. The pain started earlier at around 33-34 weeks. I don't remember experiencing the same thing with Faheem. It started with the constant urge to pee till abang insisted that i use a urinary tube haha. And then the pain at lower abdomen when baby's head has engaged (entered the pelvis). And then the back pain and joint pain. Followed by abdominal muscle pain and sharp diaphragmatic pain when the knee or probably his foot presses on my diaphragm, In the end I just cant describe what kind of pain I experience but the very thing I know, I am in such a painful state all over. I cant sleep, I cant get up easily, I cant walk, then I cant even pray in a sitting position till the end point when I feel very helpless and cry everyday kikiki. Well I tell you it is not easy to become a mum T_T

It is not a secret that I am a fanatic of shaklee supplements haha. Dari fanatik, terus jadi penjual. I have tried few other supplements but have found none that makes me feel so energetic like ESP Shaklee. Seriously bila minum rasa sangat energetic, and abang has to agree to that. This is the biggest different between my 1st and second pregnancy! Waktu 1st time pregnant tak terbuka hati nak amal supplement2 ni, sekarang ni dah tua tua baru berkesedaran ngeh3~ but the result is superb Alhamdulillah! :)

Dr Maryam Aziz

Klinik Dr Maryam Aziz

013-9144638